Because I need to put this out there

So I started writing three different times today.  The first was positive and I will return to it.  The second was half and half, but I’m going to break that up because the third… well the third the words just came flying out.  It is pretty dark and maybe I’ll edit and post in a few days.

But, after quiet the roller coast ride of emotions over the past 4 hours, I want to put this out there (but not so publicly as to post to facebook):

I’ve been sober for 3 years 4 months and 3 weeks.  And it is nights like tonight that I forget, but am so grateful, that I live in a city where you can’t buy alcohol after 11pm.  I probably would have downed the whole bottle without a thought in the world.

Thankfully my roommates don’t keep liquor here.  So, a piece of chocolate, a rather visceral and scathing writing session, and I’m off to bed to face another day tomorrow.  Please let it be better.  And please let me walk past the shops if I still crave that mental release of booze tomorrow.

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